Fire. Peter. Nowak.
By: Robert | March 12th, 2008Dax McCarty was great last night, he fought for every ball throughout the middle of the pitch, passed better than I’ve ever seen him and he even almost scored what would have been a ridiculous goal from 30 yards out. It’s obvious I have not given the kid enough praise on these here interwebs, but Dax McCarty put in work last night. He deserves an attractive picture of Katherine Heigl in his honor (if he scored it would have been Jessica Biel)
Now that I have that out of the way, WHY DOES PETER NOWAK STILL HAVE A JOB!!! He should go coach 6 year olds and work on them dribbling the ball and not falling down at the same time. Last night was all the more proof he needed Arturo Alvarez, not having him on this team may cost them a shot at the Olympics. Here, watch Arturo beat everybody off the dribble…(warning: the music is corny at best)
I don’t want to get into a discussion about U-23 tactics (have Laurie find someone to create a blog on that) but team USA seemed so deliberate and robotic with the ball I thought Bender would eventually take a free kick. Freddy Adu was only good when he said “screw it Imma make stuff up” the rest of the team slowly languished around the pitch in 3-touch soccer mode without an ounce of creativity. Say what you want about Arturo Alvarez (he doesn’t get back on defense) but creativity is not something he lacks. Peter Nowak needs to be let go immediately and we need to bribe whoever needs to be bribed to replace somebody with Arturo Alvarez.
Possible candidates: Robbie Findley, Chad Barrett, Eddie Gaven, Stuart Holden, Marvell Wynne.
Last time I said that tonight in Dallas the FC stood for “France and Croatia,” forget that FC now stands “Freakin’ Cuba?!?”
FIRE PETER NOWAK!
HOOPS PRIDE!
UPDATE: I was just alerted to this video as well, pay attention to the 1:04 mark he does something not even Landon Donovan can do.
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Comments
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I won’t be able to catch any of these games until the weekend but my impression is, we were a total let down. But seriously - Biel hotter than Heigl?
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Yeah, Jessica Biel has a longer history of hotness. Heigl is relatively new on the scene give her time, that and Izzy Stevens is crazy. But not like Mariah “Im hot AND crazy” Carey just crazy, crazy.
Side note: I have no idea what it takes to get a Jessica Alba, Halle Berry or Scarlett Johansson picture.
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Dude, Heigl was on the shitty Roswell show before Greys.
Oh well, Good luck figuring out the Alba connection. I should do a comparative dude chart but its probably not as interesting.
I heard Sacha K came off the bench and Altidore was subbed out (but because he got hurt or something?). I can’t imagine the players turned to shit all of a sudden in camp to justify all of this.
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Altidore wasn’t good. I don’t wish injury on the kid but I hope there was a reason, only once did he look like he deserved to be there.
I plan on using hot girls for my player ratings this season. Simple 1-10 is boring but arguing whether a cross or a defensive play is worth a Shakira or a Roselyn Sanchez is fun. Plus I get to rail on Keira Knightley who I do not think is hot at all.
I expect good times. Oh and I never watched Roswell.
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I can get behind the girl/player ratings system but you’ll probably need to create a post that explains the rankings first (and refer back to it from time to time). Kind of like our government’s colored terrorism alert chart but much more sensical.
At the end of the day, I think (most of) the players will appreciate your system.
I might steal your idea but turn it into a guy/player rating system if I ever get around to blogging about the women’s sport. I hope you don’t take offense and you will certainly be repped regularly as the true originator.
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You should definitely do a guy player ranking system. Just don’t use David Beckham. A) Laurie will get jealous and B)I don’t think he’s that attractive C)If Beckham doesn’t get a Beckham the universe may collapse upon itself and I don’t want to die.
I also think Ryan Reynolds circa Blade 3 should be a 7, I don’t know why but that seems right.
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I’m one of the few that thinks Becks is kind of meh. Re: Reynolds - duly noted.
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Laurie will not be happy with your anti-Beckham attractiveness comments.
Also Matt Damon can be 9 or 10 and you can use Sarah Silverman’s “I’m F*cking Matt Damon” video as proof of your claim. Coolness adds points to ones hotness.
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Oh snap, you know Sarah Silverman is a contender for your list. She’s cute AND hilarious.
I’m going ot have to think long and hard about my choices now…
I totally agree on the coolness factor. Also, more points for witty banter with Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert on their shows - case in point John Legend on Colbert last week. That guy was already high on my list, but now he’s off the charts.
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I’ve never been that big into Sarah Silverman, on my female comedy/hot meter she definitely rates below Tina Fey but above Maya Rudolph. However she did push Jimmy Kimmel into doing something funny and that isn’t easy. And I did laugh out loud numerous times during “Jesus is Magic” so maybe she should get some extra points. There’s no real wrong answer on Sarah Silverman.
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I’m a Sarah Silverman fan, for sure. I’ve never thought she was that funny… but I do watch her show…
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United States
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